Mary, Did You Know
by Carrieosity
Summary: Is it really too much to ask that a "divinely inspired" book contain accurate and complete credits? Gabriel doesn't think so. (Or: when Dean discovered that certain Christmas carols are danger zones for angels.)


Dean wasn't a big fan of cheesy, pop holiday music, but he was solidly behind celebrating Christmas with as much gusto as possible. After all, they had many years of not celebrating at all for which they had to make up. He'd only barely gotten Sam to come around to the idea that things could be different now, and that having a semi-permanent home base meant that decorations, baking, and other "frivolous" trappings were not only doable but desirable.

(He was, honestly, still working on convincing himself on that front, just in general. Maybe if he could get used to letting himself want and have mistletoe, he'd eventually work up to letting himself want and have...other things.)

So if Sam thought playing holiday CDs would help put him in the Christmas spirit, Dean was more than willing to sacrifice his ears to the cause. Well, mostly; he did have to put his foot down on the Chipmunks' holiday album. Seeing Castiel's eyes widen and head slowly turn to stare, aghast, at the stereo when it began to play had been hysterically funny and almost enough to keep him from hitting the "skip" button.

Now the music was more mellow, and he found himself singing quietly to himself - not loud enough for Sam to hear and tease - as he draped strands of tinsel over the branches of the newly acquired tree standing in the corner of the bunker library. " _Mary, did you know...that your baby boy is lord of all creation…"_

" _She damn well did_!"

Dean jumped and spun, dropping the tinsel at the sound of the angry voice shouting behind him. It wasn't unusual for Gabriel to pop in without warning, and he always relished startling Dean as much as possible when he did, but at the moment he was almost snarling as he stalked across the room, violently grabbing a candy cane from the basket sitting on the map table. Dean turned in confusion toward Cas, who hadn't even looked up from the book he was reading.

"In fairness, it's one of the few explicitly mentioned in your Bible of the many miracles in which Gabriel was directly involved. He gets a bit touchy when he doesn't get credited."

"Touchy? _Touchy_?" Gabriel fumed, stomping toward Sam, who was gaping at him from his chair in the corner. "Do you know how many times I appear in there? Hmmm?"

"Do we really have to go through this again?" Cas murmured.

"And how many times did they _bother_ to get my name right? Well?"

Castiel sighed. "Three."

"Three!" Gabe jabbed the candy cane into Sam's chest. "Told Samson's mom not to cut his hair! Stopped Abraham from killing Isaac! Wrestled Jacob until he couldn't walk! And did I get the credit? Did I get acknowledged?" He poked the candy harder with each point he made, until Sam was wincing and trying fruitlessly to push it away.

"It's not as though you signed his injured hip when you were done, Gabriel," Castiel murmured. "You're lucky he didn't just chalk it up to sciatica and some bad _sekhar_ before bed."

With that, Gabriel's face turned a deep red, and he seemed to lose his ability to speak almost entirely. Dean could only catch fragments of phrases ("Divinely inspired, my _ass!_ " and "Unbilled appearances!") between growled expletives and incoherent muttering. Castiel just rolled his eyes and sighed again, turning pages in his book. Sam stared at Dean helplessly, shrugging.

"Maybe I should…?" Dean finally murmured, reaching for the stereo controls.

"That would probably be wise," Cas agreed.

Switching to the hopefully safer "I Saw Mommy Kissing Santa Claus" (and praying Gabriel had no issues with the real historical Saint Nicholas), Dean resumed tree decorating, deciding to just let Gabriel's fury run its course. After a few more minutes of sullen ranting, the archangel finally threw himself into the chair beside Sam's, shoving the candy cane into his own mouth and crunching down hard with a scowl. The festive mood was somewhat diminished, but all was at least quiet again.

Several minutes later, Gabriel removed the candy from his mouth and huffed. "This is why unions exist, you know."

"Go ahead, then," Cas said flatly. "Heaven's politics can't possibly get any more contentious. Why not organize?"

"Damn right, I will." Making no move to do anything at all, he sank into his seat. "After the holidays, though."

"Of course. After the holidays," Cas said with a tiny smirk.


End file.
